REBBI ALMOST PLAYED IN NBA

Turned down money for Olam Haba


After recess yesterday in Yeshivas Spring Valley, a seventh grader broke the news to his friends of his Rebbi's past. "I heard Rebbi was an awesome point guard” reported Leiby Horensh, 12 of Monsey NY in his Yeshiva lunchroom. Word quickly spread to the playground and the students launched an investigation.

We traced the story’s source to Leiby's older brother Shloima Tzvi. We interviewed him at his Blueberry Hill home. “Sure it's true" he said. "Rebbi told us the story when I was in his seventh grade class twenty years ago. He said he was the best 3 point shooter on the playground and scouts came to watch him in 1952. He didn't want to brag because he said he was an anav but when they asked if he would play for the Knicks he said 'NO WAY! THE ONLY TEAM I'LL PLAY FOR IS TEAM OLAM HABAH I’LL SCORE POINTS FOR TORAH AND YIRAS SHAMAYIM!' we all cheered for Rebbi that day but thinking back he probably should have maybe given it a shot. I mean they could probally use him nowadays!"

The Rabbi in question is Rabbi Baruch Eisenstein, a 5"9, 154lb, white man. We beeped him but he never called us back to comment. He is one in the long tradition of would-be Major League players or possible NBA draft picks who gave it all up to teach middle school Yeshiva classes. Or at least that is what they tell their students.